As soon as I arrived, my mom and I went to visit my grandfather. Right now he's in an open wooden casket and will be cremated on Monday. Someone must always be with the body and the family has been taking turns staying with him. Part of me wants to blog about what a Japanese funeral is like, since it is quite fascinating and full of rituals. It's also interesting to be a part of the preparations. But I know you'll understand that I'd feel way too weird to blog about the details.
What I wanted to share was how he died. This is an aspect that brings tears to all of us, because it seems perfectly how he would have wanted it all to happen. He died suddenly and peacefully, while taking his evening bath before bedtime. But what we think about is how last fall, he changed the tatami mats in the house, so now they are beautifully fresh and perfect for the funeral. We noticed he had just weeded the yard last weekend and gathered a pile of leaves from the back of the house, so it was all clean. That night, he ate dinner and washed all his dishes. And just before getting into the bathtub, he turned off the kotatsu heater and the gas for hot water. This was what he did all the time, but in this way, he took care of everything necessary before leaving us.
And the saying goes if you die in a bathtub, that's the fastest way to heaven (or wherever it is we go) because you are all cleansed and ready for the next world.
As Ian mentioned in his wonderful post about おじいちゃん, he didn't want to cause any fuss.
I didn't realize how important it is for family to be able to see his face in a casket. Otherwise, I'd be in denial and convince myself he was just snoozing and would wake up and ask for tea.
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